[An unfortunate consequence... D'Artagnan has no direct comparison to something in his own experience as a soldier, but had they technology like that here, like what had been planted subconsciously within him as a result of his last citation, he thinks he might vaguely understand what a violation that must've been. The memory itself, Wash's capabilities he's revealing, some may think it a boon, but D'Artagnan immediately rejects that. It would be nothing short of continual torture, having nothing of the grace allotted by time in the fading of memories, complete and sharp, everything he's seen, everything he's done. D'Artagnan ducks his head for a moment, for he cannot let this man see him start crying over this, but he feels like it, the empathy nearly drowning him and making his chest tight. It's only a moment he need gather himself, ashamed in that reaction, for none of it happened to him, but... Focusing again on the point of it, why the man had spoken of it in this context, he makes an acknowledging noise, the only sign of his continued upset his fingers twisting together in now clasped hands.]

It gave you something to focus on in your attempt at distraction from your thoughts?... But something more... that you might take control of your mind, deliberately, prove to yourself... you're not part of that collective any longer, not what they made you, but your own person.

[It still sounds like a question, all of it, his assessment lacking confidence and insight, no conviction in what he's trying to understand.]