[No, it's not something D'Artagnan would recommend for himself either, playing to the aggression, someone who wanted pain or violence. He knows people who do, and he doesn't trust himself with them, doesn't wish to engage like this with them, where he does with Ororo. Not only because he loves her and it's something she wants, but because he sees her possible desires in the way Wash describes this alternative; letting go, placing herself in trusted hands, where she need not be responsible for once. D'Artagnan knows she places too much responsibility on herself, has argued he not be part of that, but she persist, as he does with those he cares for as well. It's this, he thinks, or the latter, where Ororo might simply enjoy it in a sexual manner and D'Artagnan himself is overthinking it all. Wash's question has him shifting from a comment there, to reflecting on himself.]

Well... as you've made the suggestion there, it was... to stop thinking, at one point. I was overwhelmed so much I couldn't form any coherent thoughts and it was... calming, despite the intensity.

[His teeth press into his lower lip, and he does decide to continue with more specifics.]

It was those collars Submissives were given a few months past, that... triggered orgasms by way of a... remote? It was... I'd done that with her, my girlfriend, she'd been given the remote coincidentally. I'd been uncontracted. I was reluctant at first, to try it, but it was... I liked it, and I liked not having... this tide of relentless emotions. It was peaceful, inside that constant stimulation somewhere. At other times, what I've been... what I enjoyed, is having guidance, instruction, in what to do. I suppose that's also... to stop thinking. I might do too much of that, I fear, in directing and having all the control, that I... won't know what to do when it grips me so completely, the nervous thoughts and considerations and second guessing, and panic. It's not safe if I can't trust myself not to.