[Phrased that way, D'Artagnan does see his caution has merit, and that what he feels gets things to a point faster is not always best. Objectively, he knew that, it's why he'd come, why he'd asked, but at the point he starts to become frustrated with himself, he's reluctant to hold to that approach as necessary. He nods, taking a deep breath through his nose. He appreciates Wash's insight, as they agree or think similarly on some pieces of this, but oppositionally in others, and D'Artagnan feels it more and more prudent to consider both things, what he might see of himself and his thoughts in this man's circumstances, and what jars him as unwanted for himself.
Losing myself in someone else. D'Artagnan gives that the due consideration it deserves, instead of defining it quickly and objectively. A distraction merely, he could see at first, but in understanding someone in the Wash might be able to, the way the man stares at him now, penetratingly, alert in a way he hasn't ever seen, it's different. The way he speaks about it, what the intimacy of binding another this way gives him, allows him to have, D'Artagnan feel less secure in making assumptions on, but he tries. It's important that he does, that he might comprehend as much as he can. The word that comes to him is perhaps disrespectful, but he speaks it all the same.]
Possession. You wish to leave your mark on them in a way no one else can, because you know everything about them, and you can't forget it. You might posses them, as they possess your thoughts, all encompassing, where there's nothing else that exists for that moment. Place a memory of yourself on their bodies.
[His tone is questioning as it had been earlier, but he speaks more fluidly, more comfortably with it, with his suppositions whether they be correct or not.]
You want focus outside of yourself. I want an anchor.
[When D'Artagnan had reached the point of not thinking, it wasn't to escape himself, but bring more clarity to his own mind, still very self-referential, and contained in a way he feels oftentimes that he can't be, can't manage on his own.]
no subject
Losing myself in someone else. D'Artagnan gives that the due consideration it deserves, instead of defining it quickly and objectively. A distraction merely, he could see at first, but in understanding someone in the Wash might be able to, the way the man stares at him now, penetratingly, alert in a way he hasn't ever seen, it's different. The way he speaks about it, what the intimacy of binding another this way gives him, allows him to have, D'Artagnan feel less secure in making assumptions on, but he tries. It's important that he does, that he might comprehend as much as he can. The word that comes to him is perhaps disrespectful, but he speaks it all the same.]
Possession. You wish to leave your mark on them in a way no one else can, because you know everything about them, and you can't forget it. You might posses them, as they possess your thoughts, all encompassing, where there's nothing else that exists for that moment. Place a memory of yourself on their bodies.
[His tone is questioning as it had been earlier, but he speaks more fluidly, more comfortably with it, with his suppositions whether they be correct or not.]
You want focus outside of yourself. I want an anchor.
[When D'Artagnan had reached the point of not thinking, it wasn't to escape himself, but bring more clarity to his own mind, still very self-referential, and contained in a way he feels oftentimes that he can't be, can't manage on his own.]